23 Constructive Ways To Deal With Failure
1. Understand First Why You’ve Failed
If you do not understand why you failed, then it will be difficult for you come back with a winning strategy. Most people fail because they think maybe something wasn’t meant to be or that they are not smart enough to do better.
Learning plays a big factor in dealing with defeat constructively as everyone must learn at some point in order to minimize failure.
To give you a better understanding of why you failed, consider these points:
Is what you failed at significant to you?
Why do you feel that you failed?
What should you do to decrease the chance of failure?
Were you adequately prepared?
When something means something significant to you, there’s less of a chance of failing at something. Many people think that a minimal effort will result in success in an area of life and that is simply not true.
You have to know you failed and what needs to be done to fix the problem. Poor planning will almost always result in failure at some point.
2. What Do You Want To Achieve?
Failure is a part of the growing process but if you are pursuing something then you must understand that you will fail without a doubt.
In fact, everyone does. It’s a normal part of life and there’s no reason to let it bother you constantly. You just have to learn to move on.
Have an idea of where you want to be and go for it while accepting that you will fail on your way.
Don’t let anyone discourage you as a result of your failures.
If you don’t try, you won’t succeed
Know where you belong and don’t deviate from that.
When we want to achieve something in life, we must know that there will be opposition. This is all the reason you need to keep going so to prove to yourself and others that failure can only make you better!
Don’t let your current circumstances allow you to deviate from the passion that burns within you.
3. Start to Ignore People
This may be rude in many instances but not when your failures are already enough to discourage you. People will be negative (Indefinitely) when you don’t succeed at first, but anyone great has had to walk through adversity.
It doesn’t matter what you’ve failed at. It means nothing compared to what you’re capable of and as long as you know that, you should block out negative voices.
Sometimes the people closest to you can be the biggest offenders and although you may not be able to block them out completely, it’s ok to do what’s best for you. Get yourself in a place that is away from anything that stresses you out and causes unnecessary pressure.
People will come and go but you’ll soon realize who you like to be in company with.
4. Ask For Help
There is nothing wrong at all with asking for someone else’s advice. In fact, it’s totally encouraged. No one person can do everything from their own knowledge. People before us have made mistakes so that we can learn from them.
If you need some guidance, consider these options:
Find a mentor.
Ask advice from someone who is in your desired situation.
Join a support group that can help.
The best thing we have is each other. We exist to help and encourage others to become successful in the area we desire.
Most people would be happy to give you a word of wisdom so that you can pick yourself back up and keep going. There’s no reason to think you can do everything on your own and you don’t have to try. You’ll feel better and more satisfied when you can share what’s deep inside with someone else.
You can also become more motivated to tackle your roadblocks effectively.
5. Find Helpful Resources
We live in a time where everything you need to know can either be found in a book or in the internet. Millions of people share their experiences and advice on online and it’s a never ending supply of knowledge for anyone.
The most successful people in the world take the time to write books so that we can learn strategies and information that will set us up for less failure and more achievement.
Motivation is a valuable tool and there is a way to keep yourself motivated through the storms of life.
Life gives us what we need to overcome our perceived limitations and you’d be smart to take advantage. We definitely have it better than our ancestors in many ways.
6. Try A Different Way
There is usually more than one way to do something. We tend to stick with one thing, and when that one thing doesn’t work we give up.
The saying “I’ve tried everything” is used too often and is not justified by your actions.
It’s ok to admit that you can do better as nearly anyone could do more than what they’ve been doing. Success in something is based on persistent and belief.
Also, doing something wrong will cause you to fail when all you need to do is change one thing or change your mindset. Failure can result from your perspective so consider changing it and you may see a light at the end of the tunnel.
7. Have Reasonable Expectations
You should have healthy expectations but when you don’t reach them, the thought of being a failure sets in.
We are only capable of doing so much in such a short amount of time.
Use these tips to develop healthy expectations:
Know what you want but understand there are steps needed to get there.
Set short term goals.
Decide to be happy no matter what’s happening in the present moment.
Understand that you may need some work in a certain area (You cannot succeed by neglecting a weak area).
You cannot skip any steps when it comes to accomplishing something. Don’t fail because you thought you could get to the top without starting at the bottom first. Life doesn’t work this way and you’ll waste your time by thinking that you don’t need to start small.
8. Don’t Ever Call Yourself a Failure
If you tell yourself something long enough, you’ll start to believe it. Nobody is a failure but there are people who fail to correct their mistakes and/or understand their purpose in life.
There are some ways to encourage a positive atmosphere for yourself.
How to create positivity?
Try to speak positive words daily.
Respect yourself by loving yourself.
Do something you’re good at and feel good doing (Creates confidence and passion)
It’s no secret that we can create the kind of environment that we desire. You owe it to yourself to be happy and prosperous and it takes making good choices.
The reason failure may affect someone to the point of giving up is because the mind doesn’t want to experience something that will make it uncomfortable. It’s just a defense mechanism that means nothing regarding your ability to do something.
Create your success and get over your failures by speaking positivity into your life.
9. Be Passionate
The reason why failures may never have an answer may have to do with your lack of passion for something. Failure is not uncommon when effort is at a minimum.
Now you may not be passionate all the time but to sustain a long lasting change, put forth an honest effort if you’re tired of failed attempts at achieving a desired outcome.
Too many people become complacent and unsatisfied because they simply have no desire to do anything that society would make them think is important… it’s not!
10. Respect Your Progress
Being hard on yourself and neglecting the good you’ve done so far is no way to constructively handle your failures.
You don’t want to spin your wheels and give up easily because you focus too much on the negatives of your situation. We all start somewhere, and progress is a good indicator of productivity.
Start by doing a few things daily to keep the positive alive:
Write your goals in a journal
Track your progress
Make changes when necessary
Receiving is a byproduct of respect. If you understand the process, it’s much easier to respect the journey.
By keeping track of your day to day decisions, you can have an easier idea of what to modify for improved productivity.
11. Don’t Neglect Your Wellbeing
When failure occurs, a natural reaction for many people is to get depressed and stressed out. It is not worth your health to worry about anything. Of course, if significant enough there’s always a degree of “what ifs” and “if only’s” but there needs to be other coping methods.
Keep your wellbeing in check:
Talk about it with someone.
Have other activities/options in life to direct your attention toward.
Practice good habits for the mind (Meditation, exercise etc).
It can be easy to punish yourself when things don’t go as planned. Failing at something is much less important than being in good health.
Your mind is a precious thing and no circumstances should cause you to neglect its vital role in your daily life. That is why meditation and therapy are great for maintaining great mental.
It’s so essential to treat your mind as any other part of your body but many people tend to neglect it since it’s not physically visible.
12. Find Inspiration
Get out there and forget about your failures. Travel somewhere and/or try something completely new. Many times, when people find inspiration, they forget about the past and become motivated for the future.
Here are some tips to find inspiration:
Listen to a motivating podcast.
Visit a new place/
Talk to someone in your situation or who has overcome your situation.
Try a new hobby/activity.
Inspiration can be the start to something amazing. In fact, nearly all successful people have found inspiration to become great and continue to overcome their perceived limitations. Sometimes we just remain stuck in a rut and this may be an easy fix.
One word a person says can change your whole life as much as picking up a new interest. We all deserve to be inspired by something, and it takes one decision to be open to change.
13. Surround Yourself with Positive People
Your environment can make all the difference in how you cope with failures. Get around people that will encourage you and not put you down and you may find your failures to be easier to overcome.
Your mind is already dealing with enough stress and so the best way to deal with that is to have a positive support system in any form.
Types of support systems include:
A support group
A church organization
Positive friends and family
Negativity is very toxic and if at all possible, avoid it for your wellbeing. If someone is willing to discourage you, then they don’t deserve your company while you’re dealing with your concerns.
It is acceptable to pick and choose your company so do it wisely.
14. Remember That Life Happens in Seasons
Just like there’s an end to an environmental season, there comes a time when you’ll prevail over your difficulties. It’s a waste of your valuable time to ponder on something that will pass.
The world will give back to you what you give it and when you overcome your failures, your season will come, and better days follow.
The best thing to do is to keep pursuing your desires and have hope and expect for things to work out for you. Put forth an honest effort and most times things will fall into place. Time is a concern for many but that is something completely out of our control.
So, no need to excessively worry yourself to the point of illness.
15. Avoid Isolating Yourself
It’s natural to want to be alone when you’re upset and feel hopeless. However, this makes things worse and is never recommended if you want freedom. That’s right… freedom from the negative effects of your situation/s.
Do things to stay connected:
Enjoy some time out even if by yourself (A new environment helps).
Call up someone positive.
Join a positive group.
Enjoy activities that allow for self expression.
Your mental and physical health depends on your ability to keep active and pursue life’s opportunities regardless of your circumstances.
You see, many people neglect the healing power of exposure (Putting yourself out there). You’d never see the world or become inspired by isolating yourself and you’d be missing out on a lot.
So even if for an hour a day, leave your place of pain for a place of relief and experiences.
Don’t worry about not having many connections either as time will allow for certain people in your life.
16. Pick Up and Relocate
Quitting after a few failures is not always a bad thing if you know your location does not support your endeavors.
Don’t consider the thought if relocation “running from your problems” because honestly, the place matters in special instances.
Different states and cities offer unique opportunities and new a new atmosphere could be your “saving grace.” Maybe you know someone elsewhere that has what you need whether it is opportunity or inspiration/motivation.
Don’t let a move stress you out but rather have a plan for the direction you’d like to go and the things you’d like to pursue. Many people do it and surprisingly, it’s just what they needed to flourish.
17. Re-evaluate Your Situation
“To be or not to be” … you know sometimes we just have to sit back and think about every aspect of why we are doing something. Could we have better use of our time? It’s likely you could.
Staying somewhere because it makes you money or there’s a level of comfort is a bad idea. You may not fail but if you eventually realize that you’re wasting your time, you soon will.
Everyone’s level of ambition is different… some people lack it and some people develop it. If you’re the type to desire more, then do yourself a favor and plan to do so.
Don’t wait to make a move:
Leave your current situation (Job, marriage etc).
Live life on your terms
Don’t be afraid to abandon your comfort zone entirely
If you do one of the things, you’ll be well on your way to the freedom you’ve always deserved. We should never lock ourselves in a prison, when we have full control over our outcomes in life.
It’s time to take massive action to create your best future possible.
18. Get to Know Yourself
There’s nothing wrong with spending time with “YOU.” A lot of times people are afraid to be in their own company and as a result, disappointment results from a lack of comfort with yourself.
If you can get to know more about “you” then when things fail around you, an inner strength is developed. We need to be strong all around if we are to successfully face and overcome our obstacles.
Depending on people is fine and there’s nothing wrong with it but self-sufficiency will go a long way when there’s no one to turn to but you alone.
We as a society have made it so normal to think that we need to be popular amongst people; however, that is such a false belief. There’s nothing wrong with working on yourself, which may require solitude for a bit.
19. Learn More About Your Surroundings
Unfamiliar territory can sometimes lead to failure if you’re not sure how to handle it. Although you won’t always have the choice of setting, you have to learn how to do the best with have you have and where you are.
Here are some ways to make the best of your surroundings:
Know why you’re in a place.
Do the best you can regardless of what you have.
Don’t beat yourself up if you’re not where you want to be yet.
Use resources to have a better idea of where to start and how to continue.
Ask for help
Failure doesn’t have to dictate your decision to move forward. If you can learn the basics, you’ll be able to push through anything regardless of how much or little you have to work with.
You have to start with “You” and not get ahead of what you need to first learn and do.
20. Don’t Let Anything/Anyone Steal Your Joy
You decide on your emotions. Nothing and/or no one has the right to steal your joy. You must know how to manage your emotions so that you can be in the right mind to bounce back.
Life is all about doing what’s healthy for you and maintaining a healthy mindset is key to constructively overcoming your failures.
Tips to keep yourself joyful:
Treat yourself to something you love
Understand that your failures are not the end of the world and that life has much more to offer.
Meditate and/or do some form of mind exercises.
Remember that other people are in your shoes and you’re not the only one struggling.
Know that only you can make you happy and nothing else.
Be joyful and know that good things come from being patience and never giving up. Plan for new things in your life and keep your mind focused on your life’s purpose.
21. Remember What You Want
At the end of the day what you’re trying to achieve is unique to you. No one else can understand and most of all when you’re alone they will likely not be there.
The saying “The only one that cares about you is you” is true to a degree.
No one can feel your pain and at the end of the day you know the feeling you desire from achieving your goal/s.
22. Don’t Give Up
This doesn’t mean that you have to remain pursuing the same thing but there’s obviously something you want. If failure affects you negatively then that’s a sign to keep going.
How can you be sure to never give up?
Remind yourself of the feeling you’ll have when you succeed.
Remember who you’re doing it for.
Get involved with others who can help push you through.
Accomplish one thing every day no matter how small it is.
Giving up can never be an option unless you simply lost your passion for something. This happens sometimes but you’ll know whether it’s a true feeling.
Giving up because something is hard is not a good reason to do so. Don’t abandon your desires for perceived difficulties that occur along the way.
23. Remember How Much Control You Have
If you don’t learn how to have control over your situation, then you’ll never move past your failures. It’s absolutely up to you to dictate your future and a “take charge” mindset is all you need.
Oh… and a little bit of action.
Let go of the old thought process and realize a new one is the only way to overcome a difficult situation and start seeing progress.
Your Failures Don’t Need to Hold You Back
As human beings, we tend to let failure discourage us from moving forward. In fact, some people will let failure follow them throughout a life time. This results in regret and could very well be the worst feeling to ever experience.
Start by working on yourself and being aware of the whole picture rather than just the current situation.
There are many things you can do to get yourself on track and it’ll require a combination of these decisions which will make the difference. Use resources around you and never think your situation will turn around with little to no effort.
We have people that will encourage and give us a word of positivity and this is the beauty of the process of failure. You never have to do it alone and there’s a way to do it.
Remember no one/nothing can give you every answer because at the end of the day, the timing and strategy you use is unique to you. The reason why we fail becomes quite obvious after enough attempts at success.
Make the decision to see your failures as a temporary learning curve while you’re on your way to accomplishing your ultimate goal/s.